OkCupid when a Trans Woman

If I go one OkCupid and don’t tell people I’m trans, I get one kind of jerk. If I do tell people I’m trans, I get a different type of jerk. There’s pain no matter what side of the fence you’re on. If I don’t tell people I’m trans, I get a lot more of what look like real messages—people who are trying to charm me in some way. It may not go anywhere, but they put in some effort. If you advertise that you’re trans, they put in no effort whatsoever. It’s just garbage—because they know they can get away with it. They think we’re desperate for attention: ‘This is the only message she’s going to get today.’”

Kimberly Horne, New York, N.Y.Software developer, 38, Transgender woman.


Source: Looking for Love and Acceptance.